Tamil actor Jyotika shares a warm bond with her mother-in-law, and at the 2017 Just for Women (JFW) Awards, she gave a heartwarming speech explaining why. Praising her and talking about the lessons she learnt, Jyotika said:

“At 27, I got married and met yet another dynamic lady. Someone with a very warm touch, a gentle heart, very opposite to my mother, who taught me traditions and values. My mother-in-law, who’s sitting right here. She taught me how to balance life, and despite my ferocious nature, she taught me to bring values into it. And I call her a queen because only a queen can raise a prince. Who’s very much required today for society,” she shared on stage.

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Decoding their warm bond

Dr Druhin Grover, Consultant Psychiatrist at Yashoda Medicity, says authority figures, such as in-laws, are often seen as strict, emotionally distant, and unapproachable because their roles demand composure and control. But when they interact with someone naturally warm or emotionally open, a quieter transformation unfolds: a gentler, more relaxed side emerges—one that even close family may rarely see.

“Psychologically, this suggests that perceived rigidity is often a role-based behaviour rather than the absence of feeling. Warm, lively individuals create emotional safety and offer acceptance without expectation, allowing the other person to express a side usually held back,” he tells indianexpress.com.

Jyotika and her husband Suriya recently renewed their vows. (Source: Instagram/@jyotika)

“Without demanding closeness or performance, they create emotional permission, a space where the other person does not need to uphold a role. What surfaces in these moments is not a new personality, but a hidden one, qualities long held back by circumstance rather than absence,” Dr Grover elaborates.

According to him, a daughter-in-law may relate to her mother-in-law not just through roles, but as one adult to another. When a mother-in-law feels emotionally safe and respected, closeness can grow naturally, sometimes into friendship, he informs.

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The psychologist further adds that in many households, sons often share bonds with parents built more on duty than emotional conversation. But the truth in healthy mother-in-law and daughter-in-law relationships is that emotional safety matters more than who is ‘supposed’ to be closer, he says.

“These connections flourish most in families that are emotionally open. Homes that value acceptance over hierarchy, and dialogue over control, make space for relationships to find their own rhythm,” concludes Dr Grover, adding that emotional safety matters more than who is “supposed” to be closer.